In the magical world of the internet, people want speed
and ease when they’re looking for something to read. Like distracted kids at the state fair,
we have to grab their attention and fast tract them into becoming interested in
our books. So how the heck do we accomplish that?
It all
starts with a good log line. That magical log line is the lure on the
fishing line. It has to be short enough to be read in just seconds, and yet,
snag the attention of the reader in a powerful statement about the story. I like to keep my
log lines at 10 words. It’s not easy capturing immediate attention in 10 to 25
words, but if I don’t, my potential reader is going to sail away to the next
book of interest. Log lines should taunt the reader’s curiosity.
Examples:
1. DARK ISLE, Book 1 Legends of Winatuke
trilogy
The
legend begins when love and evil collide.
2. LAKE OF SORROWS, Book 2
The legend
continues with a curse, a quest and undying love.
3. THE LIGHT OF VALMORA, Book 3
A
quest for an enchanted light...a Gypsy’s love...and a warrior’s sacrifice to
save Valmora.
Next
comes the blurb. The blurb is used to reel that reader’s
interest into caring about your story and wondering how in the world the hero
and heroine are going to find happiness together. Once again, I like to keep
mine short. I don’t like to go over 300 words. Time being a high premium these
days and the internet feeding the desire for speed, I have to state my case
with limited words, but still effectively entice my potential reader. I remember
browsing in the library for a good book to read. I took my time, read that
jacket blurb and then thumbed through a few pages here and there to check out
the author’s voice and style and get a feel for the story line. Readers aren’t going to the library as much now—a
sad, but unfortunate consequence of the internet. A blurb should include the
names of the lead characters and state their dilemma.
Examples
(all of the following blurbs are less than 100 words):
1. Pennytook/Myths,
Legends, and Midnight Kisses anthology
Pennytook is a war weary Gypsy who longs for peace from
the past and wants something meaningful in his life.
Esmeralda, a Gypsy trick rider, has harbored a deep
affection for the chieftain, Pennytook, for many years. But her dark secret will
never allow him into her life.
A mythological creature is about to unleash its horror and change the destinies
of Esmeralda and Pennytook.
2. Heart Song
Gideon thought he had the perfect life as a musician with
a beautiful model as his girlfriend, until he was diagnosed with breast cancer.
Ashamed and afraid he may die, Gideon hits bottom when his girlfriend dumps him
for a real man.
Hope comes in the form of his father’s ghost and a person he has just met. Can
he beat the odds and survive? And if he does, can he ever find happiness again?
3. The Light of
Valmora
To free his father from the witch-queen of the Dark Isle, Falcon must
find the legendary Light of Valmora that lies hidden in the darkest place on
earth—right under the witch’s feet. To complicate things further, he is
falling in love with Izabelle, the Gypsy woman who loves his brother,
Peregrine.
Izabelle struggles with her feelings for her first love, Peregrine, and
her growing affection for his brother, Falcon.
No one may survive the quest for the Light of Valmora or the wicked queen
of the Dark Isle who intends to rule the world of Winatuke.
I
like to keep my excerpts short, too. I keep them under 300
words. Celia Yeary wrote a blog about how to construct a good excerpt so I won’t
go into any detail on that account. You do want to choose something that will
peak the reader’s interest and then…quit while you’re ahead.
Examples:
1. From Pennytook/Myths,
Legends, and Midnight Kisses anthology
Where
is Esmeralda? Surely, she could not have made it beyond
this place. He choked down the dark thoughts that tried to take over his mind.
"Aye, my friend, this place is still foul. Light is
always balanced by darkness. It is the way things work in the world of
Winatuke." Sabo's expression grew solemn as he reigned in his horse beside
Pennytook.
From the depth of the forest, Pennytook heard something.
The sound had to be a horse screaming in pain, as if set upon by something
huge. But a second sound sent a chill down his spine and urgency flashed
through his body. Pennytook and Sabo glanced at one another in silent
communication, and with agile speed, they dismounted their horses, and ran
toward the sound they had heard.
2. Heart Song
Something electric sparked in
the air as silence ensued. He gazed into her eyes as if attempting to read her
heart. The oxygen left her lungs and her heart flung itself against her ribs as
he moved his lips closer to hers. The black irises in his eyes widened. His
hand held the back of her neck and his fingers slid into her ponytail and
loosed the clip that held it in place. The moment stilled. His voice sounded no
more than a raw whisper when he spoke. “I’ve wanted to do this for so long. It
feels like I’m in a dream.” Then his lips, firm and warm took hers in a kiss
that started as gentle as a snowflake falling on a pine bough.
3. Curse of the Amber Tomb/2012 Fall
Collection
The sky cracked open and rain poured down as Kate and Edward
ran. Thunder shook the earth. Edward took Kate’s
hand and pulled her after him. They got
to the gorge but the bridge hung damaged by the wind. All that remained was a rope and a few
dangling boards. The river roared below
in a sweeping surge of deadly white water.
“Edward, we’re not going to make it,” Kate cried as fear snaked up her spine. They were trapped. Behind them death approached in the form of a
hungry visage of ancient terror. Before
them was nature at its worst with nothing but a few shreds of rope to get them
to the other side and safety. It was
impossible.
He held her
close an instant. He had to raise his
voice to be heard above the wind. “Yes we are, Kate. I’m going to tighten the rope up and I’ll
walk us over to the other side.”
“I don’t
think I can do this. Besides, you’re terrified of heights. You could hardly get cross the bridge before
it was damaged. How will you do it
now?” She felt her voice pitch upward in
hysteria. “There’s no way we can make
it, Edward.”
Let
me just say right now Website excerpts do not need to be a minimalist thing. If
someone takes the time to go to your website for a look-see, they’re already
interested and looking for more, so I think you should feel free to post longer
excerpts. I have seen famous authors put the first chapter of their books on
their websites. Some of them even follow up with a chapter on an upcoming release
in the book just preceding it. Linda Lael Miller does that when she has a new
trilogy coming out. You can’t fault with success. I’ve never done that. I’ve
never had my first chapter written on the next book when I have a new release
so I’ve never tried this technique. I only know what has worked for me and that
is the minimalist thing.
Sarah J. McNeal is a
multi-published author of several genres including time travel, paranormal,
western and historical fiction. She is a retired ER and Critical Care nurse who
lives in North Carolina with her four-legged children, Lily, the Golden
Retriever and Liberty, the cat. Besides her devotion to writing, she also has a
great love of music and plays several instruments including violin, bagpipes,
guitar and harmonica. Her books and short stories may be found at Prairie Rose
Publications and its imprints Painted Pony Books, and Fire Star Press. Some of
her fantasy and paranormal books may also be found at Publishing by
Rebecca Vickery and Victory Tales Press. She welcomes you to her website
and social media:
